Rainbow Ron and the Flying Eggs of Doom
by mostlyvoidpartiallystars
Summary: Harry attempts to teach the Weasleys to dye Easter eggs. Hilarity and disaster ensue. The title is a total fail, by the way... Please read and review! :D


**_Author's Note: Howdy there, internet! It's me, GredAndForge'sGirl, and as a- er- belated Easter gift for y'all, here's a little Easter-ish oneshot to satisfy your fanfiction needs. The idea for this oneshot of insanity came from a picture I drew Easter morning. Basically, Harry attempts to teach the Weasleys how to dye Easter eggs. Hilarity and disaster ensue. Sorry if any of the characters seem OOC- this is my first real Harry Potter-Weasley oneshot. And if you ask yourself, "Wouldn't Mrs. Weasley already know how to dye eggs?" just remember that this is FANFICTION. :) It takes place during (Harry's) third year, and it is slightly AU in the fact that Harry and the Weasleys go back to the Burrow over Easter break at Hogwarts. Oh. and sorry about the lack of Bill and Charlie... Please read, and review! :)_**

**_Disclaimer: Love, if I owned Harry Potter, the only death in the books would have been ole' Moldy-Short's (And Bellatrix's, of course.)_**

In retrospect, thought Harry, perhaps teaching the Weasleys how to dye Easter eggs was not the smartest thing to do.

After Mrs. Weasley had gotten over the shock of coloring eggs ("Who in the name of Merlin would want to eat a _purple_ egg?"), and Mr. Weasley had stopped rambling about how ingenious Muggles were ("And they _actually_ dip the egg into the dye? Fascinating!"), the eggs were boiled, and the bowls were set out.

Then came the measuring of the vinegar and water into the bowls of various sizes on the kitchen table. ("So, I just add _how _many gallons of vinegar?" "You mean _tablespoons_, Mrs. Weasley?" "I could've sworn you said gallons, Harry.")

Harry then proceeded to show Molly, Arthur, Fred, George, Ron, Percy, and Ginny how to drop the tablets of color into the vinegar and water mixture, and what the little metal thing was for. ("Mum, look! It went from _clear _to _red _in less than a second, without any magic at all!" "Mr. Weasley, that's not how you're s'posed to use the metal thingy…" "Wonder how'd Percy react if we poured this down his shirt, George…" "MUM! Fred and George tried to pour the yellow dye in my hair!")

Of course, then came the demonstration. Harry dipped an egg into the blue dye, kept it there for about a minute, then pulled it back out. ("IT'S BLUE!" "Blimey! That was quick!" "_Brilliant_, those Muggles!" "We could sell these and make a lot of money, Fred… Maybe we could pretend they belong to a rare breed of bird…" "Fred, George, under _no _circumstances are you to swindle _anyone _out of their money!" "Yes, Mum…")

Then, after explaining to the Weasleys exactly _how_ this happened ("Bloody brilliant, if you ask me."), Harry left them to their egg-dying.

As everyone should know, leaving the Weasley family in an enclosed space filled with eggs and multi-colored dye, disasters were bound to occur.

Harry, however, not (technically) being a Weasley, hadn't an idea of what was to happen.

So when the Boy-Who-Lived walked back into the Burrow's kitchen fifteen minutes later, he expected to see at least half a dozen eggs dyed and ready to be eaten.

Instead, he was met with a horrifying sight of general chaos.

Yolk and eggshells were _everywhere_- it appeared Mrs. Weasley had neglected to _boil _the eggs ("Gross! I just slipped in egg goo!"); Fred and George, laughing hysterically, were taking turns hurling the raw, uncooked eggs at Percy ("20 points if it hits his Head Boy badge!" "NOT THE HEAD BOY BADGE! ANYTHING BUT THE HEAD BOY BADGE!"), as Ginny watched and laughed behind Percy- that is, she was laughing until one of the eggs flew off target and cracked open on her face ("Hahahahah-" CRACK. "EWWWW! I'M GONNA KILL YOU TWO!"); Mrs. Weasley was shouting her head off at anyone who would listen ("FRED! GEORGE! STOP THROWING EGGS AT YOUR BROTHER NOW! GINNY, STOP LAUGHING! PERCY, STOP SOBBING, IT'S ONLY A BADGE! ARTHUR, _DO SOMETHING_!"); Mr. Weasley was excitedly examining the metal thing ("Look, Molly! It _scoops_ the egg out of the dye!"); and Ron had somehow managed to cover himself with the egg dye, resulting in the redhead looking like a huge rainbow ("MY EYES! I GOT ORANGE DYE IN MY EYES!")

After Mrs. Weasley had shouted herself hoarse at the twins, Ginny had hexed Fred and George thoroughly and gotten the egg out of her hair, Percy had stopped crying long enough to re- polish his badge, Ron had changed out of his rainbow-ed clothing and rinsed his (now orange) eyes out with water, and Harry had finally managed to tug the egg-scooper away from Mr. Weasley; the kitchen was scrubbed, the eggs were thrown away, and the dye was cleaned up.

Harry learned a very important lesson on what NEVER to do that day: NEVER, under under circumstances, attempt to teach the Weasleys a Muggle tradition ever again.

But, Harry thought later, he just couldn't _wait _to teach them about all the fun Christmas traditions...


End file.
